Where's Your Costume?
by she-dragon
Summary: Goku, Gohan and Krillin manage to drag Piccolo and Vegita to a haunted house. PG13 for language because I wasn't sure what the rating should be.


Disclaimer: I own jack diddley, bubkiss, nadda, zilch, zero, nothing, the big goose-egg, you get the picture, and so you see that if you sue me, it would be a big waste of your time.  
A/N: Fair warning, the characters may be a little ooc. Thanks, gokou_chan for suggesting that I put Veggie in this. Great idea.  
  
Where's Your Costume?  
  
Piccolo knocked on the door of the Son house, not in the best of moods. Once again, Gohan had talked him into a stupid, hair-brained, childish venture. He didn't know why he put up with it, no one else got away with this kind of shit.  
A miniature version of himself answered the door.   
Piccolo took a startled step backwards. "What the hell?"  
The little him took off his turban, pointy ears coming off with it, and a cascade of black hair tumbled down. "It's me, Mr. Piccolo!" Gohan announced with a grin and Piccolo could see that the boy even had a pair of fake fangs.  
The grin suddenly faded. "Uh, Piccolo, where's your costume?"  
"Huh?"  
"Your costume," Gohan repeated. "It's Halloween. Don't you have a costume?"  
Piccolo frowned. "I'm the Demon King, kid. I don't need a costume."  
"Oh. Okay."  
"GOHAN!" Chi-chi screeched. "SHUT THE DOOR!"  
Gohan led Piccolo into the living room where Chi-chi glared at him before stomping into the kitchen. He smirked. Anything that rumpled Chi-chi's feathers was good for him.  
Thumping on the stairs caught his attention. He turned to see a large grasshopper coming down the stairs, its butt knocking on the stairs.  
"What the-" Piccolo began.  
"Piccolo! Hi!" the grasshopper called cheerily, then reached up and popped off its head. And there was Goku, grinning like a Cheshire cat. "Do you like my costume?"  
Piccolo made a non-committal noise.  
Goku's face fell as he realized what Piccolo was wearing. "Where's your costume?"  
Piccolo's frown deepened. "I don't need a costume."  
"Oh. Okay." A rather hard rap on the door shook the wall and cut off anything more Goku might have been going to say.  
Goku went to the door, leaving Piccolo alone with mini-him. Gohan pulled all of his hair on top of his head and again donned his turban, pulling the ears back into place.  
"How do I look?" he asked.  
Before the Namek could answer, a fit of laughter erupted at the front door. He and Gohan went to investigate, and found Vegita, in full battle armor, flat on his back, cackling like a madman while grasshopper Goku looked on, confused.  
"What is he doing here?" Piccolo asked Gohan.  
"Dad invited him. He thought it might loosen Vegita up."  
Piccolo glanced at the laughing Saiyan. "It worked."  
Hearing other voices, Vegita straightened up to glare at them. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded.  
"I could ask you the same question," Piccolo answered.  
Vegita harrumphed, then noticed Gohan. And did a double take. "So, I see the Namek has spawned."  
Piccolo bristled and Gohan blushed under his green face paint.  
"So, green-man," Vegita continued, "where's your costume?"  
"I DON'T NEED A DAMN COSTUME!!!"  
"Of course not," Vegita snickered.  
"Where's yours?" Piccolo demanded.  
Vegita smirked, gesturing at his armor. "I'm a Saiyan Prince."  
Goku noticed that Piccolo looked like he was about to blow up, and so said, "Well, let's go guys."  
"You're not going like that," Vegita said, looking at Goku.  
"Why not?" Goku asked.  
"Because the PriNCE OF ALL SAIYANS DOES NOT GO PLACES WITH BIG DAMN BUGS!!!"  
"Uh, hey, guys, what's up?"  
They all turned to find Krillin, dressed as a genie, standing on the porch.  
Vegita snorted. Then sniggered.  
"What the hell are you?" Piccolo demanded.  
"Mr. Clean," Krillin answered, triumphantly.  
Vegita howled with laughter.  
Krillin frowned. "Where are your costumes?"  
Vegita stopped laughing. "I am a Saiyan Prince."  
Piccolo just glowered.  
"Come on, guys," Goku said. "Get in the car."  
"Piccolo's the Demon King," Gohan explained as the headed to the car. "So he doesn't need a costume."  
  
"I can't believe you blasted my costume!" Goku wailed for the hundredth time.  
Vegita smirked. "Believe it, baka."  
"I can't!"  
"Shut up!" Piccolo roared, the smell of burnt foam rubber giving him a headache. "If he hadn't done it, you'd still be trying to figure out how to get in the damn car!"  
Krillin and Gohan peeked across Piccolo at each other, and nodded. Time to diffuse the situation.  
"Dad!" Gohan exclaimed. "Pull in there!"  
"Where?"  
"Hannibal's House of Horrors!!"  
"WHAT!?!" Vegita and Piccolo both exclaimed.  
"Okay," Goku agreed. "Sounds like fun."  
He pulled the car over and the Z warriors got out of the car. As they approached the haunted house, a red demon with black horns and hooves approached.  
"Hello good sirs, and welcome to Hannibal's House of Horrors."  
"Thanks," Goku said.  
Piccolo glared at the demon. "What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded.  
The demon blinked. "Well, uh, I..."   
"Go back to Hell." Piccolo snarled. "NOW!!!" "Now just a damn minute, buddy," the demon snapped. "Who do you think you are?"  
"He's the Demon King," Gohan answered, helpfully.  
"You don't want to piss him off," Krillin added.  
"I don't care who he is," the demon caterwauled, "he can't-"  
MASENKO!!!" Piccolo hollered, and when the dust cleared, all that remained of the demon was a black smear on the pavement.  
"Pic-ah-loooooo!!" Gohan whined.  
"WHAT?!?" "He wasn't a real demon! He was a guy in a costume!"  
"Whatever." Piccolo continued on his way to the haunted house.  
Goku shrugged and followed, the rest close behind.  
  
Piccolo glared around the white room, trying to find the way out amongst the strobe lights and the fog. He took a step forward and ran into a wall.  
"Dammit!" he yelled, rubbing his forehead.  
"How many times are you going to run into that wall, baka?" Vegita's voice asked from somewhere in the fog.  
"Shut up," Piccolo grumbled, flapping his cape to try to disperse the fog.  
"Anyone find the exit yet?" Krillin called.  
"Found it!" Gohan crowed, and Piccolo reached through the fog until he latched onto his pupil. He felt a hand grab his shoulder, and tolerated the touch as Gohan led all of them out of the white room.  
Into a room of pitch black, lit only by black lights.  
"What are these?" Piccolo asked, staring at his shoulder pads.  
"Cool!" Vegita exclaimed, grabbing hold of Piccolo's cape so he could play with it in the black lights.  
"Hey!" Piccolo yelled. "Hands off the cape, pal!" He jerked his cape out from Vegita's hands.  
Part of the wall suddenly moved to hit a black trash can with a hammer.  
Vegita yelped and bolted, running a few feet before realizing what he was doing.  
Piccolo jumped, then whirled and lifted the wall off of its feet.  
"What are you?" he demanded.  
"I...I...work here," the wall squeaked.   
"It's just another guy in a costume!" Gohan exclaimed.  
"Yeah, Piccy, put him down."  
Piccolo dropped the wall man and turned on Goku. "Never. In your life. Call. Me. That."  
"Okay, Picster," Goku grinned. "Hey, Vegita! Wait up!"  
Piccolo ground his teeth and followed.  
"You were scared!" Gohan crowed as the five moved into the next room. This room was filled with corpses in many stages of decay, suffering from several different forms of torture.  
"THE PRINCE OFF ALL SAIYANS DOES NOT GET SCARED!!!"  
"BOO!!!" one of the corpses screeched, popping up from a coffin.  
Vegita jumped with a scream, then was gone.  
"Where did he go?" Krillin asked as the four warriors looked around, baffled.  
Piccolo suddenly stiffened, and whirled around. Or at least tried to whirl around. Something seemed to be keeping him from turning.  
He tried to jerk his cape up, but something was holding it.  
"Get the hell out from under my cape!" he bawled, finally managing to pull his cape free.  
To reveal the Prince of all Saiyans, huddled beneath it.  
Vegita stood up, dusting imaginary dirt from his armor. He glared at Goku, Krillin, and Gohan, who were all sniggering.  
"What are you laughing at, cue-ball?" Vegita glowered.  
Krillin paled.  
"Oh, come on," Gohan said, pulling Piccolo into the next room.  
Where they stepped down into a foot of cold water.  
"What the-" Piccolo began as Gohan made a disgusted noise.  
"Son of a bitch!" Vegita yelled.  
"Aw, man," Krillin frowned.  
"Hey! This could be fun!" Goku announced.  
Piccolo turned, grabbing him by his grasshopper shirt front, swept his feet out from under him, and dropped Goku into the water.  
"Thanks, man," Krillin said.  
"Any time."  
"See?" Goku grinned from where he sat. "I told you this could be fun!"  
"SNAKES!!!!" Vegita squealed, sounding surprisingly like a girl. He lifted off, rising until his back pressed against the ceiling. "DIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!" he screeched, letting loose a barrage of ki blasts.  
"Vegita! Wait!" Krillin yelped.  
When the smoke cleared, the room of water was just a charred room with four crispy Z fighters standing in its center.  
Piccolo glanced at his shoulder pad, then slapped a hand onto the flames that still burned there. Gohan frowned, one of his pointy ears had been burned off. Goku's mask crumbled and fell to the floor. Krillin, bald head scorched, held up a slightly melted snake.  
"They're rubber, baka!" he yelled.  
"WHAT?!?" Vegita landed. "What did you call me? I'm the Pri-"  
"SHUT!!!!! UP!!!!!" the four toasted warriors yelled.  
Vegita frowned, then stomped into the next room. The others could see the red lights that lit the room, but that was it. So, they began to follow.  
A terrified, high pitched scream filled the room, followed by the sound of a revving chainsaw and maniacal laughter.  
"Let's go!" Goku yelled.  
"No way," Krillin said. "I'm not going in there."  
"Me either," Gohan said, hiding behind Piccolo.  
Piccolo crossed his arms and glared at Goku who was staring at him imploringly. "Forget it."  
The conversation was cut off when a man with a bloody stump for an arm, a chainsaw in his good hand, and a hockey mask came out of the red room.  
"Uh, excuse me sirs?" the one-armed man asked. "Can I have a moment of your time?"  
Goku looked at Piccolo, who shrugged. What did he care? He wasn't planning on going any farther into this death trap.  
"Sure," Goku said.  
The man reached up with an arm he produced from inside his shirt and pushed his mask up. Piccolo's eyes widened.  
"Are you with that gentleman with the troll doll hairdo?"  
"Huh? Oh, yeah, that's Vegita," Goku answered.  
"Well, sirs, do you think it would be possible for you to go in there and get him?"  
"Only if you tell me how you did that," Piccolo said before Goku could answer.  
"How I did what?" the man asked, confused.  
"That. That bit with the arm."  
"Oh," the man laughed. "the stump's fake. I just keep my real arm inside my shirt."  
"It's fake?" Piccolo said.  
"Yes, sir."  
"This entire place is fake?"  
"Of course. It's just a haunted house. It's for fun."  
"You scare people for fun?"  
"Yes, sir."  
Piccolo glared. Then fired a ki blast at the man. It sailed past his ear, close enough to singe his hair. The man fell down, backing away, babbling incoherently.  
"PICCOLO!!" Gohan and Krillin yelled.  
"What did you do that for?" Goku wanted to know.  
"Heh. You're right," Piccolo addressed the man. "Scaring people is fun."  
He marched into the red room. "Oh Vegita!!" he called, getting no answer.  
He pulled a sheet off the wall, draping it over himself. He searched, and finally spied Vegita curled in a fetal position under a table, sucking his thumb.  
Piccolo took two running steps, then leaped on top of the table as he screamed, "I'VE COME FOR YOU!!!!" He landed with a loud bang.  
Vegita bolted from under the table, screaming bloody murder as he ran back towards the water room.  
"Woo Haa!!" Piccolo yelled after him. "Tri-form!" he announced, and split into three.  
One of the new Piccolos grabbed a mask like the one used on Hannibal Lector, and the other grabbed a bleeding skull mask. Then all three headed after Vegita.  
Who had climbed up Goku and was perched on his shoulders, babbling incoherently.  
"Vegita!" Goku yelped around a mouthful of boot. "Calm down."  
"I WANNA GO HOME!!!!" Vegita bawled, tears streaming down his face.  
"Man, is Vegita freaked or what?" Krillin whispered to Gohan.  
"Yeah, I know."  
"VEEGEEEEEETAHHHHH!" a large, white shrouded specter moaned as it came out of the red room.  
"MOMMEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" Vegita howled, taking off for the front door.  
"Vegita," Goku called. "It's just a-"  
A figure in a Hannibal Lector mask burst through the wall next to Goku. "HONEY!!!" it screeched, "I'M HOME!!!!"  
Goku jumped, then hauled ass after Vegita.  
Krillin and Gohan exchanged tense glances, the giggled nervously. A long finger nail tapped them both on a shoulder.  
They turned slowly to come face to face with a glowing figure with a bleeding skull for a head.  
"Boo," it said, calmly.  
Both warriors squealed and ran after the two Saiyans, all three apparitions in hot pursuit.  
The three stopped at the door to the haunted house to take off their costumes and lean over each other, laughing as the four "brave" Z fighters fought to get into the car which squealed off before all the doors were shut.  
"Uh, excuse me, sirs?"  
The Piccolos turned to face the ghoul that had addressed them.  
"How would you three like a job?" it asked.  
The Piccolos exchanged glances, and decided to stay in tri-form. "Sure," they answered. Three Nameks, three times the money.  
"Great. Can you start today?"  
They glanced in the direction their ride had gone. "Why not? I have the costume."  
  



End file.
